There was a very popular movie years back that made a lot of money and inspired many with dreams of everlasting love that conquers all. A handsome, rich young man and a beautiful, smart poor girl fall madly in love and despite all the love in the world she gets ill and dies. A friend of mine told me a while back, ever notice all great love stories end sadly with someone losing the other? I wanted to argue that thought, but after ruffling through the movies in my mind it occurred to me Romeo and Juliet was not exactly the happiest of stories. So, maybe he was right afterall.
The greatest Love Story of all is the love that God has for all of us and that is forever. Like a father filled with love no matter what we do... he still wants to forgive us, whether we beg for forgiveness or whether we sit there like stubborn children refusing to say we are sorry.
When this poster came out to the publicize one of the greatest love stories ever told... everyone made fun of this quote as totally silly and illogical and not realistic. Years later in the movie "What's Up Doc?" Ryan O Neal got the last word on the old joke and when Barbra Streisand bats her eyes and him at the end of the movie and says, "Love means never having to say you're sorry..." Ryan O Neal rolls his eyes and says, "that's the stupidest thing I've ever heard..." and they kiss and well the movie ends a whole lot happier than Love Story where Ali MacGraw bites the dust.
Do we really need to say we are sorry other others before Yom Kippur or even any day of the week? How important is it to say you are sorry? Well, sometimes we say we are sorry because we are really the one that needs to forgive ourselves for the foolish things we have done in moments of anger or folly or just plain old tiredness. We need the gift of forgiveness for not being as perfect as we wish we were and no matter how much we work on it the goal of perfection just keeps moving further and further away from us.
As we move into a world filled with Geulah we are redeemed by just by being here and yet it doesn't hurt to ever show your love or respect for someone to ask forgiveness for something you may have done knowingly or unknowingly.
Spreading around goodness and kindness never hurt anyone...and forgiving ourselves is the first step to being happy and moving forward without the baggage of the mistakes of the past.
When you really love someone, you love them no matter how they hurt you and no matter how much you wish you didn't love them....it's hard to stop loving them and hard to not forgive them. Love just is and love is good and love is kind and love IS patient to quote a friend who likes to quote his bible.
We need to love each other, all of us.... another Jew, another you, another friend down the street and even the teacher who tells you that he is doing this for your own good. Love means accepting someone at their word and seeing the good in them, seeing through their flaws and forgiving ourselves for not being the person that we wish we could be.
Sometimes it's just accepting the situation the way it is and not how we wished we could make it.. sometimes no matter how hard you wish for something it doesn't come to be... like at the end of Love Story when she slowly slips away and he is alone in winter without the love of his life. The love stays inside, it doesn't go away and we remember the good times as time goes by.
It's an amazing world we live in today. Years ago people would memorize Torah so that they could walk in the street and learn a bit, today you can be in Georgia and call into a phone number in Michigan and connect to someone in Oklahoma who is learning with someone in New York or Jerusalem and walk in the street and listen to Torah being learned via a cell phone. We've come along way from the old days.... we have come so far that sometimes without stopping and realizing how miraculous our world is and how we are all connected across the world via the Internet and our Cell Phones that we don't realize how wondrous it is and it all seems "normal" to be able to live this way. But, it's not... we live in incredible times and we need to really open our eyes and see how incredible this time we live in is indeed.
So, this Yom Kippur, while celebrating the holiday ask yourself forgiveness for not being perfect. And, give thanks to Hashem who is perfect and knows what is best for us even when we don't understand his logic.
Love means never really HAVING to say you're sorry, but it doesn't hurt to say it to Hashem or to your friend down the block or across the continent on Facebook and it doesn't hurt to forgive yourself as you go into Yom Kippur.
And, while celebrating this day of redemption and moving forward into the coming year with resolutions to do good and spread love around.... remember to taste some honey cake and have a sweet year!
Rosh Hashanah is the birthday of mankind, Yom Kippur is the wedding between us and God so feel the love and feel the forgiveness always.
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